Book of Comfort

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Table of contents

Chapters

1. You did not appear by change into this painful world

2. Not everybody in this broken world had a good upbringing

3. God's heart is very soft for those who are exploited

4. You can be 'the blessed person' in a troubled family

5. You don't have to continue to live with domestic violence

6. God is near you when you feel betrayed by other people

7. When we have no other options God is still the solution

8. Restoration from sexual abuse is possible with God

9. Waiting time might seem to make you almost crazy

10. People we least expect to be lonely can be lonely

Dedication

This book is written to comfort those of you who suffer in silence in this broken world. It is especially for you who, for whatever reason, cannot take part in the fellowship of enjoying God's presence in worship, prayer, and bible study together with friends. Jesus has a habit of entering through closed doors and appearing in places where a person seeks Him.

Thanks

Thanks to my dear wife, Elin, my daughters Christina, Ditte, Teresa and my son David for your love, patience and help all the years. Thanks to family, friends and colleagues for all your help and support for this book.

Greetings

You might, like me, have come as a surprise for your parents into this broken world. You might be one of my dear friends among the ten million beautiful Filipino citizens who work outside your country - far away from family and loved ones. You might be a rich - but lonely housewife in Dubai living in a marriage, which did not go the way you were dreaming of. You might be a housekeeper in a hotel, changing sheets on beds where other people sleep comfortably at night. You might be required to do work in ways you feel are not fair and right at all, but you have to earn the daily bread for you and your family back home.

You might be in a waiting position that seems endless; waiting for a visa or for a country to accept you, and you just need strength to have the patience to not give up. You might be lying in a sickbed waiting, trusting Jesus will heal you, like He healed many in the Bible - or you suffer in another way... You are not alone. God is there with you. You might be weary in your body or even in your soul. You might be an overseas worker, who is required to stay in the employer’s house all the time. Jesus is the only one who can really comfort and strengthen us human beings in all areas of our troubled life. Though He is God the Son, He entered into this broken world of pain, betrayal, cheating, exploitation, misunderstandings, lies and rejection - and He tasted it all. As you start to read this Bible-based book of comfort and encouragement, it is my deep desire that you will experience His presence. You can read one chapter (5 min.) any time of the day or night.

If you read it in the morning you can receive strength for the day. If you read it at night you can receive peace as you put your head on the pillow and fall asleep in God the Father’s mighty arms. Until we get through our time of testing, we need fresh water in the desert. May God’s angels minister to you right now. All the different persons mentioned in this book are dear people, friends I met personally on my life’s journey. All names have been changed for their discretion. Some of them have got a good life while others are still waiting, working hard, struggling and trusting Jesus for an answer. I am one of them. Trusting Jesus in both joyful and difficult days.

Your friend and brother,

Josef

Chapter 1

You did not appear by chance into this painful world

You might, like me, have come as a surprise to your parents, but not to God. Each one of us is carefully planned and created by God Himself from before the world began. My mother died when I was 21 years old, and she told me, that she felt she was done with having children as she already had a handful and did not want to have one more - me. She told me: “When you were born, I, of course, loved you very much.” After her passing away, I felt empty and rejected. Who am I? Should I not have been born? Rejection and the feeling of rejection is one of the biggest problems in the world today. We feel rejected and may even reject each other without being aware of it.

Or maybe we experience real rejection when somebody calls us names or tells us how worthless we are. Let's not believe a lie and die. God created us beautifully. Someone has said: "Everybody who smiles is beautiful." Today God will put a smile on your face and put joy in your heart as you pray a simple prayer to thank Him for the life you have been given and trust Him for His love for you - as a beloved daughter or son. He will let you start to believe for a good future.

Chapter 2

Not everybody in this broken world had a good upbringing

A young father came to me one day and said he struggled. He really loved his wife and two kids deeply, and most of the time he managed to be a loving and caring father. His problem was, that in some situations he felt a fit of deep anger take over his personality, which was very hurting to his wife and kids. After a long conversation, I asked him about his relationship with his own father. He immediately said: “I will forgive all on earth, but not him.” His father had done horrible things to him almost from when he was born. One thing out of the many things he told me was this: “One day my father had guests coming to our home.

He introduced my older siblings with great pride. Then he pointed at me and said casually: “And this is Ian, our little scum.” Next day in school I put my hand up and asked the teacher: “What is scum?” Hmm, the teacher said. “It is something you just throw out.” This young father was a victim of anger, which he could not control. Years of rejection from his own father had made him try to suppress his anger towards his father. Most of the time it went well, but when something unfair happened he would explode. You and I did not choose our parents. If you have loving parents, thank God. If you had a difficult upbringing, you can turn to God and tell him about your emotions and pain. He is a perfect, loving and just Father who will always understand you, and He can break all the lies and bad words, which have been said to you. Today you can start to believe His kind words to you. He is not a capricious father with changing mood swings. He loves you unconditionally every single day - also when you annoy Him.

Chapter 3

God's heart is very soft for those who are exploited in their work situation

God is constantly looking on all the earth and whenever He sees a person who is treated unjustly, He is waiting for this person to cry out in prayer to Him. Then He starts to send His angels to this person to comfort, help and change the situation. Maria came one night to the House of Mercy in North Cyprus. She was broken. She had not been in her homeland for 8 years and had not seen her mother during this time. She was working hard to support the family. When her mother got very ill, she asked her employer to allow her to go home and see her mother for the last time.

Her employer unfortunately did not pay any attention to Maria’s plea, even though it was a big rich company. Later she came, and with tears she told us her mother had passed away. Of course, we prayed and ministered to her, but it did not finish there. She now told her employer about the funeral and pleaded for permission to go home. We prayed for this to happen, but he did not change his attitude. The employer was more interested in keeping the big business going than in caring for Maria. How do we respond to such a situation? God is watching, and we should never doubt His willingness to take action in due time. He will judge and He cares. Remember, it is not how we start; it is how we finish. All revenge belongs to Him. He will punish all evil that wants to destroy love, and one day, He will reward the one who humbly continues to love, trust and seek His face. God who created the eyes and ears sees and hears everything, and in God’s perfect time, (could be soon or after some time). He will put things right.

Chapter 4

You can be 'the blessed person' in a troubled family

I met John and his wife Marion when John was only 21 years old. When I saw this smiling and good-looking couple, I thought they looked like people who never had problems.

As I got to know John, I soon found out that his life had not been easy at all. John’s father was a businessman and had abandoned John’s mother when John was only 5 years old.

The reason was that he decided to have the secretary instead of John’s mother, who in her desperate situation started to comfort herself with alcohol.

She even tried to drown herself to get rid of her pain, and John found her unconscious in the bathtub and brought her back to life. He was only 13 years old. Unfortunately, this young mother in her thirties passed away when John was just eighteen. I was so shocked. But that was not all. John told me his grandfather had previously done the same as John’s father and was also with another woman having abandoned John’s grandmother

As a young pastor, I started to get concerned about John and his wife. Would the same thing happen to John and Marion? Sociologists tell us that things are often repeated generation after generation.

As our friendship developed, we talked about this, and John was willing to do anything to be faithful to his wife and his kids. We prayed together often, and one night we saw the power of Jesus. It was a tangible and wonderful change when John was set free from this family curse.

It is now more than 25 years ago, and John and Marion are still together in a happy and faithful marriage. They are now even helping many other marriages including John’s own family. I was deeply moved, when John, who is now 47, recently told me, that he had ministered and prayed with his own father, who in tears was convicted to repent of his selfish lifestyle.

One person in a big troubled family has become 'the blessed person’; a key person for the blessing of many. Your life might have tendencies of repeating the pain of past generations, but with God’s help, you can be 'the blessed one’- a key to blessing for many.

Never ever accept a cursed life. Reach out and break free by the power of Jesus. He is alive and is still doing wonders.

Chapter 5

You don't have to continue to live with domestic violence

Jen, a young mother came to me one day with fear in her eyes. She had a hard time opening her mouth, but after a while she became calm.

Jen was married to a man from a different cultural background. Jen said: “I am scared, for my husband says he will kill me and my baby if I tell anybody that he is hitting me. He has hit me several times, but it was an eyeopener when he hit me while I had my baby in my arms and we fell to the floor.”

Jen had finally done the right thing, which all women should do when they are victims of domestic violence. Reach out for help.

It often seems difficult and even impossible to break out of a violent relationship. The fear, the threats, the need for support and finance, the escape, the future protection, the humiliation, the lies, the doubt about if I deserved to be hit, the families, the authorities and many other fears.

It often takes years and a lot of pain before women come to a point where the need for help has outrun the fear. In this case, there was no way back. The husband did not show any signs of remorse.

Jen received help to hide, and a long journey of restoration for her began. Today she is fine, and her baby daughter is a beautiful grown woman.

It might look difficult for you, even impossible, but nothing is impossible with God's and good people's help. There are good people in every nation who care for battered women. You can find help no matter what nationality and religion you have. Freedom starts in your mind. Can you imagine a life without beatings, shouts and threats? Yes, you can! If you take a moment and think when you are all by yourself, you can start to dream again about a good future. Nobody needs a violent spouse.

You do not need a violent spouse. If you know he is not open to counselling, it is time to rescue yourself, and maybe you have kids who need to be spared a childhood filled with domestic violence.

Even if he has promised to change, but has not kept his word, you need help. I have even known men who have changed after their secret violent life was made known.

Today is the day you can make one of your life’s big decisions. Reach out to somebody you can trust who has the willingness and availability to help.

Chapter 6

God is near you when you feel betrayed by other people

I met Melissa, a woman in her twenties living in a big city. She had been working hard in another country to earn her wages and tried faithfully to take care of her own life and her family back home.

She was a quiet woman and she just wanted to stay out of trouble, but one day she lost her job. After a month of looking around, her work permit ran out and she became illegal.

She really didn’t know what to do, as she could not, at this time, find a new employer who was willing to hire her and pay for her insurance and work permit.

Because she needed the money so much, she started a part-time job without a work permit.

In the meantime, she was trying to find a legal job, but it took a long time. Her life was work, sleep, work etc.

She had very few friends and could only sometimes attend Church. Normally people protect each other in crisis situations and that also happened to Melissa for a long time.

But one day she met a new friend. This new friend was a woman who knew how to talk, and Melissa felt she was blessed. What she didn’t know was that this new friend had problems of her own.

Sometimes people try to comfort themselves by focusing on other people’s trials. Melissa’s friend, unfortunately, did that. She asked her all kind of questions, and since Melissa felt comforted by telling her friend about her hard life and trouble, she told her about her illegal work situation. Shortly after, the police visited Melissa’s home and she was immediately deported from that country. When Melissa shared her story with me of being betrayed, I was reminded of Jesus being betrayed by Judas.

Jesus had graciously included Judas in his team of 12 disciples for 3 years and Judas had enjoyed the blessings of being in the presence of God’s Son.

Later, when Jesus was in the Garden of Olives to pray and prepare himself to die for the sins of the world, it was Judas who led his enemies to find Jesus.

We talked about this, and I was so encouraged by Melissa’s understanding of the power of forgiveness.

She was now in another country, and God had blessed her with a new employer and a new life. What was the key? Melissa had prayed and shared her pain with Jesus. She had forgiven her ‘friend’ as Jesus had forgiven Melissa for all her faults. She was grateful, happy and restored from the betrayal. Jesus understands betrayal and He will give you the help and understanding to move on as you seek Him in prayer.

Chapter 7

When we have no other options God is still the solution to all our needs

Melody, a middle-aged mother was working abroad, far away from home in a country where the police seem to think they are right whatever happens.

One day a policeman was not attentive and literally drove into Melody as she was walking downtown. The car ran over her whole body and several bones were broken as well as severe wounding.

She was taken to hospital and had surgery, and for 7 months she was in bed with little expectation of recovery.

One of my friends told me about Melody and asked me to see her so we could pray for her and encourage her. It was actually on her birthday that we went. It was sad to see her trying to sit up in bed.

After we had eaten and sung a birthday song for Melody, we called all the guests together and surrounded Melody to pray for her.

We all put our trust in Jesus together and many tears were shed as we looked at this wounded mother. When we left, we were still affected deeply by her condition.

Sometime later we decided to visit her again to pray and encourage her. When we came to her place, we were very surprised to find her standing outside the house waiting for us.

We were overjoyed, as she told us how she suddenly felt a change and she said: “I believe Jesus has healed me.” Many tears were shed again, but this time they were tears of joy and gratitude.

Melody got different jobs as her strength started to come back to her, and today she is working in a supermarket where she is standing up all day.

Several times I have brought people to meet her in the supermarket to have their trust in God strengthened. Every time I see her behind the counter, I feel overwhelmed by God’s love and care for people with no other options.

He is always there for us. Even though the policeman tried to cheat Melody by offering her a little amount (which could not even pay for the surgery) Melody is full of joy. She says: “It is ok, brother Josef, no problem, God will take care of me.”

Melody has really been an encouragement for us to trust in God. I hope she is for you too.

Let us pray, that God will lead you to somebody's sickbed - or God will lead somebody to your sickbed, somebody who will stand together with you and pray with you. United prayers in Jesus’ name have great power.

Chapter 8

Restoration from sexual abuse is possible with God

Ernesto, a young handsome man in his early twenties came to our prayer meeting one Saturday night.

I noticed he looked sad and was very quiet. He introduced himself and told us he had worked in Saudi Arabia but had left and now wanted to work here.

As the prayer meeting went on with worship and a ministry time, we noticed Ernesto was sitting crying and was not well. As all were very aware of his situation, we asked if we could pray for him.

He was more than willing to let us do that. Just as we started to pray, he suddenly said: “I wanted to die, I wanted to die.” We were naturally surprised and asked what was going on in his life.

He told us that one day 3 men had surrounded him and for a whole day had sexually assaulted and abused him until he was totally broken.

After they performed their evil deeds on him, one of the men felt pity for him and set him free. When he later found himself alone, humiliated, sexually abused and confused, his thoughts were to get out of the country.

He went back to his homeland for a short time, and his mother told him to come to the country where she was working. His mother had invited him to the prayer meeting, and after we heard about his experiences, we started to pray for him.

With many of us praying in tears, we saw God's healing love set this young man free from all the hurts and dirt that these men had put on Ernesto. God started to restore his life. One afternoon, when I met him, I asked if I could tell his story in this book. He said yes and told me more details about his past.

It has been so wonderful to see how God has answered prayer. Today he is happy with his wife, Theresa, and they have just got a healthy little daughter.

Ernesto is doing great. He is a faithful manager in a company and his boss has entrusted him to take care of the business when he is not around. God has given Ernesto a wonderful restoration in his life.

Nothing is too hard for God. Pray to the One who created Heaven, Earth and all living things, He can restore everything.

Whatever experiences of horrible, evil sexual abuse you had in the past; God can make you feel as pure as a new-born baby. You can have a blessed future.

Chapter 9

Waiting time might seem to make you almost crazy

The first time we met them was in a refugee camp. The mother, Judith, was with her two daughters Dorothy and Camina.

They had lived in the Middle East for many years and had a dream to go to a land where they could think, work and live out their dream.

They had been on the move as refugees for many years, far away from their homeland, trying to come to Europe.

Just before they were about to jump into a rubber boat with other refugees the police had caught them.

The daughters, who were 15 and 17 years old at the time, were crying and begging the police not to send them back to their original homeland. The police miraculously honoured their plea and they were sent to a refugee camp close to where my wife and I lived.

These three women were brave, intelligent and full of appetite for the future. One night I was sharing a simple message called “Jesus is looking for you.”

The mother and the 15 year old daughter were in a home where 10 other Muslim people were listening. After I had shared about Jesus, I offered to pray with the people.

I went around to every one of them and gently laid my hand on each one’s shoulder as I said: “Please Jesus, come and touch this precious person.”

The young 15 year old girl fell back in the sofa, just sitting relaxed for some time and I moved on to pray for the rest of the people in the room.

This is what the young daughter told us later: “When you prayed for me, you kind of disappeared, and I saw another person in white robes, who spoke gently to me. I felt so peaceful, and today I know it was Jesus Christ, I saw in the vision.”

We were, of course, overjoyed, when both the mother and the two daughters accepted Jesus Christ as their Saviour and together with a friend of mine who was also a pastor, we baptized them. They were happy and started to attend our weekly Bible studies.

But the years passed, and they were still stuck in the country. Actually, they waited in this country for six years, and often they felt depressed and were tempted to give up. They had been rejected by the Far East country they had applied to, and it often looked like the hope for change was lost. They ended up waiting more than 15 years before their dream came true.

Our task was to encourage and comfort them, and one day they were miraculously rewarded for not giving up. To the glory of God, they came to the land that they had been dreaming of and today they are really doing fine and have got a new future.

Last year I performed the marriage ceremony for the oldest daughter who is now 25 years old. The entire family is blessed and can move on with their dreams.

I trust this miraculous story can give you faith, hope and patience to wait on God with expectation and initiative.

Waiting time must never be wasted by doing nothing, but every day we can take a little step to prepare ourselves for a great future. God will reward you if you continue to thank and trust Him.

Chapter 10

People we least expect to be lonely can be lonely

Because we in this world are so influenced by commercials, ads and consumer-orientated moneymaking machines, we often feel left out.

We sometimes live a lie, where we think, that if we just had a little more money to buy this and that, we would have more respect and acceptance and feel better.

Women and girls are often under pressure because they want to be attractive with their appearance.

I counselled a middle-aged woman who had been married for some time, and now she felt lonely because she thought her husband had lost interest in her and was looking at other women.

I had known this woman for a long time, and I knew she had 'a heart of gold' and deserved to be treated as such.

The battle happened in her mind. She felt lonely and she needed someone to tell her how valuable she was - just by being herself.

True beauty will not fade as it comes from within. Sometimes we just need a little encouragement to remember that.

When you start to believe you are valuable just for who you are, you lift your head and you get out of the victim mentality.

You may even put your foot down and start to address unacceptable behaviour from your spouse. The truth will always set us free.

Sometimes we have to face the fear with truth instead of living in uncertainty. Truth spoken in love is powerful.

When you start to love yourself as God loves you, your value in other people’s eyes will increase. I am not talking about an imaginary unrealistic illusion. Just be you. It is said, that 'people who smile are beautiful.'

Today God will convince you of your precious value as you seek and trust His word.

Last Words

It is my hope, that these brief testimonies you have read will comfort you and give you strength and encourage you to move on with your life and trust in Jesus.

However, our real and eternal comfort is found in the Bible, and in the last part of the Bible we see how glorious everything will be when this life is over.

I wrote this little book for two reasons:

Firstly, to give hope and comfort to you who suffer in silence, especially to you, who, for different reasons, are not able - or are limited to fellowship with friends as they come together and enjoy God’s presence in worship, prayer and Bible study.

Secondly, to give the coming generations a document about God’s goodness and faithfulness – to all human beings but especially to those who want to put their trust in Jesus.

Life is not always easy, but God is good all the time. I have come to the conclusion, that this life with all its´ beauty, love, friendships, nature etc. - and also all its trouble, is about preparation for eternal life. Life after death.

The life which will continue forever and ever - like looking into space. It never ends out there. For if it ended, what would be beyond it?

We will live for all eternity, when this earthly troubled life is over. Somebody has said: “All our pain and struggles in this present life will be felt just like two nights in a secondclass hotel, when we come to the other side, in God’s eternal glory. Although this is an incomplete illustration, it gives us an idea, that something much much better is waiting for the believer.

So, for those who have put their trust in Jesus, having the eternal perspective will enrich this troubled life.

Jesus said: “Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you.” This is really possible, when we receive strength to live the “Jesus way.”

For God himself will put everything right on the other side. Jesus will be the righteous judge of all human beings. Therefore, it is so important to pray and let God deal with those who treat us wrongly in this life.

God can indeed change our circumstances in this life when we pray, and we are many who have experienced that again and again.

But if He chooses to wait, we should also wait and not take our case into our own hands, for we might be in danger of doing wrong in God’s eyes.

My earthly father said something to me when I was a child. I will never forget this. He said: “It is much better to be wronged, than to wrong somebody.” As I get closer to the end of this life, I start to understand it better and better. Let’s be careful with our words and deeds.

Words like “No problem, I forgive you” – “It’s ok, please don’t worry” - and also words like “Please forgive me” – “I am so sorry” – “I was wrong” - are words coming from the heart out of the mouth of those who want to be with Jesus for eternity. It is all possible, when we pray to Him for help.

When we are going to meet Jesus on the other side, we will be united with Him forever in endless joy. That is why the Bible describes eternity as like a beautiful marriage.

The bride, we who believe, will be united forever with Him, Jesus Christ, who gave his life for us, when He died on the cross for all our sins. When we know this is what´s going to happen, we want to prepare ourselves. Our best preparation will be to pray and read His words each day and pray to receive His power and instruction to do right – to be light in this dark and troubled world.

The Bible speaks about the heavenly marriage, that we, the bride will be granted “to clothe herself with fine linen, bright and pure, and that fine linen is the righteous deeds of the saints.”

So, it does matter how we as believers live our lives. May we daily make a decision and turn to God in both good and difficult situations.

About the author

Josef, together with his wife Elin, have enjoyed serving in Denmark and the Middle East for many years, along with longtime friends from different nations.

For the last 8 years the couple has been serving in the Turkish part of North Cyprus. After pastoring a local multi-cultural Church in central Copenhagen, Denmark, Josef and Elin came to North Cyprus in 2011, where “House of Mercy” was established. Their friends include Wig & Jean Gorubat, a Filipino couple, who have served their community in North Cyprus for more than 10 years. Their aim has been to establish “A home far away from home” for overseas workers living in North Cyprus.

Josef believes that practical care for people under pressure is a vital part of the gospel of Jesus Christ. All believers in the world should find their unique way of living out their spiritual life in practical ways. Josef and Elin have been married for 39 years and have 4 grown-up children and 6 grandchildren.

If you were encouraged by this book, please feel free to forward it to somebody you care for